Monday, July 14, 2008

What I Learned At the Library

I learned, from bawdy brothers, who had no choice to take me on as a sister, how to say: "Shut the fuck up, motherfucker." Not normally found in my vernacular, I decided to try it on. . . and see how it fit.
"Shut the fuck up,
motherfucker."
Might be one on the most liberating phrases known to man.
I learned other things too. I learned how to talk about another person's mother.
"Hey, maybe we should stamp some cards for tonight."
"Yeah? Maybe your mom should stamp some cards for tonight."
I don't even know what that means. Or if I should be offended.
I learned how to act a goddamn fool. I learned how to smile more. I learned how to do that roll thing with my arms, you know, that wave thing? I can only do it to one side, but I'm still working on it. I learned how to run around and act like the boys. When asked:
"You wanna shelve some of these books?"
I learned to reply:
"How about you shut the fuck up, motherfucker!"
"Yeah, but the books?"
"Maybe your mom can shelve the books."
"Oooh!"
We always fall for that one. I'm getting better.

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